Listening To: Remedy (Disc 1 – Pre Op) : Various Artists

So, the beautiful IG and I sat down to watch BB-Uncut last night. We missed it last week, but wanted to catch it this time ’round after our weekend trip to Adelaide (more on that might be posted later). Seeing this confirmed a few things for me, which have become pretty edvident over the last few weeks :

(1) Glenn from Hickville … is a complete frikkin arse-clown ! Actually – all the guys this year pretty much are tools, except for Tim.

(2) Tim is a freakin legend, and deserves to win !

It’d no surprise, really, that Glenn is a moron of the highest order. What kind of retard picks another guy to go into the rewards room with him ? The latest episode of uncut showed another side to the carrot-topped simpleton however … the sleazy, randy side unfortunately. Given that a ‘highlight’ of the episode was Glenn ‘getting it on’ with the equally-aesthetically-challenged Geneva, complete with 60′s-risque-pseudo-porn editing which substituted cliched images of fireworks and exploding champagne bottles for the moment when ole’ carrot top presumably creamed his jocks (leaving Geneva less-than-satisfied) … I think IG’s comment of the moment summed it up best “Ewwww ! It’s like two ginger haired guys getting it on. I think I’m gonna be sick !” :)

We were also treated to Glenn and the other lads (bar Tim) lighting their own farts, and Glenn doing his best bubble-boy impersonation with the aid of a handy condom. Oh yes, and a couple of sequences of the lads going into the toilets to take turns shaking hands with the bishop ! I was almost expecting a circle-jerk at one point, and I wouldn’t be surprised if this didn’t actually eventuate, and was simply not shown ! Quality-fŨcking-televison, literally.

The episode also showed a snippet of some of the meaner things the “lads” (hereafter known as The Retards Collective), headed up by none other than our favourite Cletus-from-the-Simpsons-lookalike, Glenn, have been doing to Tim. Hog-tied, punched in the nuts, wrestled – all of these things he’s had to put up with. Yet when BB called Tim into the diary room for a bit of a chat, and gave him the opportunity to have the guys disciplined for their bullying essentially on a platter, Tim actually told him “no, it’s OK, I’ve had worse, I don’t feel like I’m being bullied”. Hats off to Tim, ladies and gentlemen – there is a man with BIIIIG fŨcking balls ! If it was me, I would have long ago gone to the diary room to have a chat to BB off my own bat. But Tim is happy to grin and bear it. Now who wants to talk to me about ‘whining lefties’ ?

The other reason Tim is legend in my book (and should be in yours), is of course precisely because he is a Leftie – certified, signed, sealed and delivered ! He used to write for The Chaser, and lately has penned stuff for Workers Online. In this day and age, in a houseful of extreme-right Liberal loonies like Nelson and Angela (and Glenn too, I’d wager), it’s freaking fantastic to see an articulate, intelligent, politically active, union-supporting, young man like Tim step up and boldly proclaim “Hey, I might act a bit creepy around girls, my haircut might be a decade out of date, and my fashion sense doesn’t really work outside ‘a Newtown, but fukkit … I’m left-wing and proud of it, and I can go head to head with a bunch of jock-Liberal-retards and emerge out the other side. Maybe victorious, maybe not … either way I’ll emerge intact, and so will my big balls !”

Go Timmie, go – you’ve got my vote to win son … and with the unions behind you (if the Workers Online site is to be believed), there’s a small chance we MIGHT even swing it !